David Bowie told me to do it in a dream.

Fat, sexually frustrated teen stuck in Colorado.

I have a strange infatuation with Morrissey and Conor Oberst.

I spend most of my time playing my ukulele in my underwear and bitching about my life.

Have fun.
Interviewer: Is there any truth in the story that you were penpals with Morrissey and he wrote "Found Found Found" about you?
Michael Stipe: I don't think I know that song. We met three times and he sent me postcards. We went walking in London. He's a really nice guy. The judge in The Smiths court case said he was untrustworthy. Fuckhead.